Game 3 Running Diary

We’re live from Woods basement with Wood, Trev, Abby, and Dossin for my first career running diary. Couldn’t be more excited.

First Quarter

9:30 After the Celtics jump out to a quick 7-0 lead, Rashard Lewis misses a wide open three from the corner, prompting the first “the late Rashard Lewis” joke from Wood. The over/under for the night is 6.5. I pounced on the over. Seriously though, Lewis has nearly singlehandedly killed any chance for this Magic team to win this series. He has to be a viable scoring option for them to be a legitimate contender. Last year against the Celtics, he averaged just over 20 points a game in the playoffs. This year he has averaged 5.5 over the first two games of this series.

8:35 The camera cuts to a busty woman in the crowd. Dossin says look at the chick with the boobs. As opposed to the chick without the boobs… sometimes you just don’t know with Dossin (just kidding Doss we love ya.)

7:30 Matt Barnes scores in transition to cut the Celtics’ lead to 7-4. You get the feeling that if the Celtics can jump on Orlando early in this game they’ll fold. A big first quarter would be nice.

6:00 Ray Allen dunks over Dwight Howard after taking a dip in the hot tub time machine, prompting a chorus of OHHHHHHS from the room. After being left for dead and shopped around at the trade deadline, Ray’s quiet rejuvenation these playoffs has been an underplayed story, lost in all the “Rajon Rondo is now the leader of this team” hype. The announcers love playing the “you won’t believe this, but the best player on this team may not be Paul Pierce, Ray Allen, or KG, it’s Rajon Rondo.” These are the things that bug you about national announcers. I just want to say “No shit, he’s been the best player on this team since the second half of LAST season. Do your fucking homework guys.”

5:42 DORIS BURKE IN HD ALERT!! DORIS BURKE IN HD ALERT!! That should have flashed across the screen before she popped up.

5:13 Pierce draws a foul on Matt Barnes after an up-fake. He’s the best in the league at doing that. Dossin has cracked 3 lame jokes already. I have under 12.5 in that category, starting to regret that one.

3:15 16-6 Celtics after a perk layup. Wood says the magic’s offense is a joke, he’ll be a guest on the podcast later this week. There is a twilight commercial on tv and we just learned that Wilson likes Twilight! What the fuck? 2:50 Pierce for 3! If anyone wants to tell the Magic the series started 5 days ago, feel free. Rondo outhustles Dwight howard for a rebound, seriously, where the fuck are the magic?

0:24 Sheed finishes an alley oop. Call the national guard, cuz we are KILLIN the magic. 27-12 after the first. Wow. I thought we’d see Orlando’s best game tonight. YIKES. Dwight has 1 point so far. ONE POINT! At this point, the series is basically over and it’s time to ask what we think of the Lakers. They are playing so well but your offense is bound to look good against the Suns. They may have been a different team this year, but do we really think they can get stops when it matters? The Lakers won’t be scoring 120 a game against this Celtics team. Maybe I’m getting ahead of myself…

2^{nd Quarter}

^{10:38 Mark Jackson calls the Celtics defense a thing of beauty.} I agree, but it might be more accurate to just call the Magic offense a thing of ugly. Either way, we got ourselves a blowout.

830 Rondo comes from 15 feet behind Jason Williams to come up with a loose ball in the backcourt and he finishes for a layup. That was just the defining play of why the Celtics are destroying the Magic in this series, and it will be a highlight for years to come. The C’s may win this game by 40.

7:28 Trev calls JJ Reddick JJ red dick, like when a dog gets a red rocket. I like it. Sheldon Williams looks like mahi mahi according to Trev. Here’s a photo of each. I’ll let you be the judge.

630 BIG BABY! 43-19! What are we doing at halftime?.

3 – Big baby has the most ridiculous looking picture with a huge smile. He can’t seem to get a normal looking picture.

0:40 The Celtics come up with a ridiculous rebound when rondo skies above 3 magic players to tip the ball to glen Davis, who saves it to Ray Allen. We have won 100% of the 50/50 balls tonight.

51-34 at the half, and it’s not even this close. This game is O-V-A.

Since the game was over at the half, I stopped the diary here. The Magic did nothing to make themselves look any better in the second half, and it looked like the C’s could have won by 50 if they really wanted to. Beat LA baby!